Is motherhood really competitive?

November 23, 2009

I read this article today about how women tend to be harsh on other women who are perceived to make the “wrong choice”, when it comes to motherhood. I can really relate to this article, which describes motherhood as a competitive sport.

Although I have calmed down quite a lot after all these years, I must say that at some point, I did succumb to the pressure of trying to be “the perfect mother” and judge others for their choices.

I have now come to realise that it wasn’t about the people around me. Who cares if people judge? It only matters if I am the one who judges myself. Life gets easier when I don’t judge and accept me for who I am.

When it comes to motherhood however, I’d still do things the way I do and had done. For example, for now, I won’t go back to a full time (9 to 5) job. If I were to be a mother all over again, I’ll choose natural birth over C-section and  breastfeed. But I’d do all these for a completely different reason.

It’s no longer about being righteous and because it’s “the right thing to do”.  I do not believe in right and wrong anymore. But I’ll do them simply because I have made peace with my choices.

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