Archive for the 'Uncategorized' Category

My new address

January 12, 2011

Hi there, I have moved  to a new address. Please click on norlin.my to read my future post. My main focus will be on my children’s activities. Thank you very much for your interest.

Norlin

Just saying…

April 28, 2010

If I want what others want,

I will have to live my

life the way others live theirs .

How an iPhone can benefit a 3 year-old

December 3, 2009

I used to tell my husband that until an iPhone can express milk or babysit, I will continue to NOT be impressed by it. I saw this online article today.  Even though it doesn’t make me want to rush out of the house and go grab an iPhone for my 3-year-old, it has certainly changed the way I look at it.

Finally, a social network safe for kids, 7-17

December 2, 2009

I was very excited when I saw this post by Social Media Mom, on MyAlltop this morning. Just a couple of weeks ago I met several mothers at fit for 2 cafe who voiced their concerns over Cyber bullying. They were also anxious that they weren’t clued in on the sites their kids were entering.

A few days after the conversation took place, my daughter’s friend invited her to open a Facebook account. I said no, to her because she is under 13. If I were to let her open an FB account and allow her to exaggerate her age, I guess what I am telling her is that it is ok to lie. The consequence would be, she may take it as a green light for her to enter other websites, even if they aren’t age-appropriate.

I checked out FaceChipz earlier today and am impressed at their security features. The site has a filter that block out swear words and inappropriate emoticons. It also disallows any search engines from picking up the kids’ postings . Read more on the safety and privacy highlights.

What is also interesting is, it provides Cyber Safety guidelines for parents and educators as well as a printable agreement for using the Internet which we can download and use as a contract with our children.

How FaceChipz works as a social network is, both parents and children have to sign up and pay USD1 for registration. Take note that only parents and guardian can pay for the registration via credit/debit cards.

The next step is to purchase Chipz from FaceChipz store. Children can then exchange their chips with other children, and this can only be done in person. After swapping the chipz they are then required to register the code printed behind the chipz on the website, before they can become friends.

Apparently FaceChipz is really catching on. I am planning to register my daughter and check out its popularity in Malaysia.

If you are reading this, and your children is a FaceChipz user, please let me know about your children and your experience. I would really love to hear from you.

Is motherhood really competitive?

November 23, 2009

I read this article today about how women tend to be harsh on other women who are perceived to make the “wrong choice”, when it comes to motherhood. I can really relate to this article, which describes motherhood as a competitive sport.

Although I have calmed down quite a lot after all these years, I must say that at some point, I did succumb to the pressure of trying to be “the perfect mother” and judge others for their choices.

I have now come to realise that it wasn’t about the people around me. Who cares if people judge? It only matters if I am the one who judges myself. Life gets easier when I don’t judge and accept me for who I am.

When it comes to motherhood however, I’d still do things the way I do and had done. For example, for now, I won’t go back to a full time (9 to 5) job. If I were to be a mother all over again, I’ll choose natural birth over C-section and  breastfeed. But I’d do all these for a completely different reason.

It’s no longer about being righteous and because it’s “the right thing to do”.  I do not believe in right and wrong anymore. But I’ll do them simply because I have made peace with my choices.

It’s the hard-wiring

November 17, 2009

I am blessed with two children whose personalities are at two opposite extreme. My daughter, Ishra, is very girlie. She loves pink, Barbie and rhythmic gymnastic. My son, Aditya, on the other hand likes to play in the mud, enjoys trailing creepy-crawlies and gets easily impressed with anything that moves at breakneck speed.

Playing with her 3-year-old brother used to be a challenge for my daughter who is now 7. My son would pull her hair, grabbed the toys he wanted away from her and even kicked her if he didn’t get what he wanted. At one time, I  found dealing with his violent behaviour very frustrating.

It took a while for me to realise that my kids are two different people with two completely different personalities. Recently, in my efforts to try to understand these differences I came across The Female Brain by Louann Brizendine M.D. I learned so much about the female brain from the book (and a bit about the male’s hard-wiring). I immediately connect with the book which provides me insights into some of the events I experienced with my kids.

One of them happened when my daughter was about two-and-a-half year old. My husband bought her a toy car when he was abroad for work. Then one fine night, we caught her wrapping the car in a blanket. The next minute she tugged it into bed and started singing a lullaby.

Taking my daughter to a sit-down dinner was never a problem from the time she was a baby. In fact we never had to change much of our lifestyle after she was born. If she did something she wasn’t supposed to, all I needed to do was glare or stare disapprovingly at her and she would stop.

In The Female Brain, Dr Brizendine explained that girls “are born interested in emotional expression.” It’s their hard-wiring! They understand cues and would constantly look for approval.

Taking my son to at restaurant however was a challenge right from the start. To begin with, he does not sit still. His curiousity always gets the best of him and he would touch anything he lays his eyes on. And, it doesn’t help that he is oblivious to my display of emotion, or my vocal tones!

Through my reading I have learned to accept and celebrate my children and their differences. Nowadays, I am also more aware of how different their approaches are towards the same tasks. This has allowed me to understand and enjoy them  more. I still face challenges every now and then, but at least I don’t sweat the small stuff anymore.

Full-time Mum/Entrepreneur – A Possible Combo

October 19, 2009

I am really glad that last  Friday, I dragged myself out of the house and went to Fit For 2 in Bangsar, for its Bumps, Mums and Muffins session.

That day the topic was on starting a business from home. When Debbie, owner of  Fit For 2,  posted the event via Facebook, I knew it was a session I wouldn’t  miss.

There, several women shared their experiences on working a business around their children time while others spoke of their ideas and challenges.

Like some of these women, the main reason why I want to work from home is so I am able to work around my family time, particularly my two children.

I have tried being a working mum and a full-time mum but neither worked for me. What I have always wanted for myself since the day my daughter was born, was to find something that gives me income, yet I can do mostly from home.

At the same time I am not interested in multilevel marketing as my experience was, I ended up being the end user. What more, the amount of time that I would have to spend outside of  my home recruiting and attending meeting and seminar is not something I want to invest in.

That very day, Anita who is a SAHM,  shared with us how she started her quilt business via her blog  http://www.quiltsandothers.blogspot.com/ The mother of two also offered tips on how to register a business while Debbie gave us some ideas on how to work out the pricing of a product.

They also mentioned the importance of support from husbands and the significance of doing things that one is passionate about.

As I recently launched my new website editorexpress which offers editorial services, I find the the session very helpful. Just knowing that  there are mothers out there who are doing well at juggling their roles as a full time mum and a business owner, make me realise that I am on track.

In search of a playschool for active kids

October 12, 2009

playschool

Three months after my three-year-old son started playschool he refused to return. He’d given me indications that he wasn’t that interested in the school. But I didn’t take him seriously at first.

My intention of sending him to a play school is so he can play with other children around his age. And my idea of a play school is a place where young children learn through play. In fact that was the understanding that I got from looking at the school’s toddlers program as well as from my conversation with the supervisor.

But I soon found out that the teacher expected my son to sit still in class. This is impossible as he is a very active child. And if something doesn’t capture him there is no way he will give it any attention. Almost everyday when I picked him up from school he complained about being scolded by the teacher, “because I didn’t listen.”

I tried talking to the teacher who labeled my son as “hyper” in his first week at school. (I later realised her choice of word was due to her lack of understanding of the word “hyper”. She is also more fluent in Malay than in English). I told her that I just wanted to get my son to play with other kids but she was more keen on getting my son to hold a pencil correctly! She also  complained that my son didn’t want to share and have very short attention span.

I then decided to send my son to playschool three times a week instead of the 5-day week routine. As I felt the teacher could not provide my son with the activities he needed. My son picked up what he learned in school despite the teacher’s claim of him having short attention span. But he also showed sign of distress like when he hold a pencil at home, he would be upset about not knowing how to write numbers. One day he freaked me out when out of the blue he said he wanted to beat the teacher! When I asked him about it, he said he didn’t like the teacher.

A few weeks a go I drove him to school and the moment we reached the place, he refused to get out of the car. He threw a huge tantrum and cried. He asked me to take him to another school.

A week after the incident I got a call from the school supervisor who said they needed my son in school, for a photo session. It was to be a photo session for the school’s coming concert where kids are to pose in their costumes. When I told her my son refused to go to school, she asked me to try to talk to my son and get him to school in 20 minutes so he won’t miss the shoot.

I later had a word with a few friends about this. One friend who also have an active son said it was not easy to find a playschool/kindy for his boy. She felt that the schools here (in Malaysia, unlike in Australia) aren’t suited to boys particularly those with a lot of energy.

So here I go again in search of a playschool that caters to my son’s needs. Possibly, one nearby and not academic oriented.

Caught in the rain

October 7, 2009

rain

We were at the park the other day when it started pouring. It happened so fast that we could not run for shelter. In fact, by the time my 3-year-old son moved from the swing to his bike, we were already drenched.

At this point it dawned on me, there was no point of rushing home as we were already soaked. However, my mommy brain insisted that I perform what is commonly termed as motherly duty. Get my son out of the rain and head straight home. But I decided to shut off my mommy brain.

When I was small, I used to play in the rain whenever I had the chance to, except during thunder and storm (just in case you are wondering). In fact the kids I grew up with did the same.

I used to live in a teacher’s quarters as my parents were teachers. My house was in the school compound and I would walk to school everyday. Walking home from school gets even more exciting when it rained. I would put my school shoes in my bag and play in the puddle! I also enjoyed squishing the mud and the soft, gooey red earth with my feet! Imagine the mud and puddles that occupied me as I had to pass a huge field before reaching home!

Things must have changed since. One afternoon, several months ago my husband, my two kids and me went for a picnic at the Kiara Park. It rained right after we finished lunch. We ended up sitting in a hut watching the heavy rain and a man-made waterfall nearby. As it started  to drizzle, I let my son and daughter go out  in the open.

The moment my son started running on the grass an elderly woman began to give me a piece of unsolicited advise. She just went on and on, basically questioning our decision to let the kids play outside in a wet weather. I took her words with a pinch of salt (actually more like tonnes of salt).

I guess people don’t play in the rain as they used to. Or maybe it’s just the grownups who don’t. Or maybe as we grow older we forget how to have fun or cease to remember the things that shape our childhood.

Whatever it is this grownup is glad she stayed in the rain and let her son did the same that very day at the park. My son and me had so much fun. We ended up laughing all the way home.

Cool children apparel

September 14, 2009

I just love the stuff they have here  http://www.lilclothes.com/